If you're lost I'll keep you warm
by Kyokorain
Summary: Inuyasha reflects on his childhood and his brother. I would lke to dedicate this story to my best friend Casey yeah! ONESHOT please read it sux at summerys read! warning OOC
1. Chapter 1

If you're lost I'll keep you warm and if your low just hold on..cause I will be your safety...don't leave home...

_My brother is, was, and will always be the most important person in my life. As children, he was my hero. I followed him wherever he went. My greatest dream was to become strong and brave, to impress him, to see him smile one more time. _

_I was not brave as a child; the tiniest bolt of lighting sent me flying into to my Nissan's bedchamber. He would groan when I begged for his protection from the frightening night, but not once did he turn me away to face the terror of the dark on my own. He taught me all the things that his teachers taught him. My brother taught me to fight, eat, speak, write, read, cook and rule a country. The most horrifying days of my childhood were those spent alone, when my brother was on training trips. During those times I would huddle under my blankets jumping at the slightest noise. I was more afraid then, than I ever have been fighting demons. I always made Nissan swear he would come back to me whenever he left on a journey. He always would. He would kneel down to my height, put his hand on my shoulder and give his word that he would return. The most special thing about him was his smiles. They were rare, but when he smiled at me, I felt like I was the most important and loved person in the entire world. I know this sounds like we had a loving, trusting relationship. I thought we did. I thought he loved me as his younger brother. WHAT WENT WRONG? Was it something I did? Was it because of my sword? I would gladly give up the fang if it meant I could be his brother again. I thought he cared more about me than a stupid weapon. He did so many horrible things. I mean, HE PRETENTED HE COULD BRING BACK MY MOTHER! How could I have trusted him? Did he always hate me? Even when he protected me or swore he'd come back? How could my life go so wrong? _

Inuyasha put down the stick that Kagome called a "pen". Kagome had given him this book that she called a journal. She told him to write down his secret thoughts. She had explained that if he wrote about memories or thoughts that had hurt him, he might feel better. Inuyasha let out a breath that he hadn't realized he had been holding. Writing all his sorrow onto paper, knowing that no one would ever read it, was a release, it felt comforting.

Glancing up, Inuyasha caught the scent that he loved but at the same time was so frightened of. Somewhere in the distance, Kagome screamed. Inuyasha shivered. HE was here, and looking for a fight. Jumping down from his perch in the holy tree, Inuyasha hastily shoved the journal into the folds of his kimono. He ran unsteadily towards that beautiful, awful scent. Inuyasha was weak. He felt emotionally drained. He knew he couldn't withstand Sesshomaru for very long, but he had to try. He had to protect his friends.

"In-u-ya-sha!" Kagome was impatient "You're here… well, hurry up and finish him!" Inuyasha had taken a long time to show up to save her, and now that he was here, he was just staring at Sesshomaru with a mixture of hurt and anger on his face. What was his problem? Kagome just wanted Inuyasha to wrap things up quickly, so she could get on with the search for his journal. The only reason that she bought the cheesy thing for him was so she could find out how he really felt about her.

Inuyasha pushed back his persistent memories and ran at his brother. Sesshomaru seemed much faster than before. Every time Inuyasha lunged forward, he was thrown painfully to the ground. He would need all of his concentration just to stay alive, and it was pretty hard to focus with Kagome shrieking his name every ten seconds. It was getting harder to keep jumping up and attacking. His thoughts were running wild maybe he could… No! Transforming was not an option, he could kill his friends!

Inuyasha lay on the ground, gasping for breath. Miroku was worried. Inuyasha was not his usual self. He seemed much weaker. There had been no sarcastic wise cracks, and Inuyasha's eyes were red and puffy, as though he had been crying. Miroku realized that if this battle dragged on any longer, Inuyasha would most definitely be killed. It was all up to him now.

Inuyasha struggled to his feet after another painful blow. He glanced towards his friends and saw Miroku fumbling with the prayer beads on his cursed hand.

"Sesshomaru, you don't have any hell wasps to protect you this time! Taste my WIND TUNNEL!" Miroku unleashed the deadly wind, intent on ridding the world of the demon lord, but in front of him was Inuyasha,

"Stop it Miroku you can't kill him …th…this is my fight!" Miroku quickly sealed his wind tunnel, shocked at the desperation and fear he had heard in his friend's voice. Inuyasha suddenly, without warning, collapsed onto the blood soaked earth. A small book fell from his robes. A small flash of worry crossed the elder brother's face as he reached down to pick up the book.

Sesshomaru had not intended on Inuyasha losing consciousness. He had only wished to test the boy's strength, nothing more. The little book that had fallen from his half brother's clothing mystified him. Sesshomaru bent to retrieve the book. As he read the pages he felt his heart being crushed.

_Flashback: "Sesshomaru! Why do give that half breed love and attention? He is a disgrace to this family! And for that matter so are you! The only reason I let that boy live is because your grandmother wishes it! You will never gain respect as a lord if you associate yourself with lowly humans and half humans. Let me do my ONLY son a favour. I am sending you to the North to train with many powerful demons and you are not to return for seventy years! Now have I made myself perfectly clear?" _

"_Yes Father." _

Sesshomaru looked down at his unconscious brother and did something he had been told never to do again.

Inuyasha came too and found someone holding him the way his brother had when he was nothing more than a frightened child. He smelled salt. Someone was crying. Was it Kagome? No, these tears were different…sweeter.

He opened his eyes. Sesshomaru was holding him, crying over him, and whispering,

"Inuyasha. Oh Gods. Inuyasha I'm sorry, I'm so very sorry. How could I do this to you? I am a monster! Please forgive me. I want to be your brother again. I'm sorry, oh Gods so, so sorry." Inuyasha reached up and touched his brother's face. Sesshomaru gave him a desperate smile and Inuyasha smiled back, before falling into darkness.

Kagome was in shock. The brothers, the hated rivals; they were together. The older one was cradling the younger in his arms and babbling out apologies. Is that what was in his journal? Was it something about his brother? How could Inuyasha be so insensitive? He was supposed to write about his feelings for her! Why, after all their time together, had Inuyasha decided to write about his stupid, traitorous, brother; rather than the approved love of his life? It wasn't fair! Maybe Inuyasha wasn't good enough for her anyway. After all, he was just a half demon, a stupid no good dirty blood half-breed…

"I dare you to say that again human!"

Kagome hadn't noticed that she was muttering. Sesshomaru did not have his usual stoic air about him. His face was covered in tear streaks, and his brother's blood. What terrified Kagome the most was look on his face, he was so angry that his eyes were red and his fangs were leaking poison. The mighty demon that was holding her by the throat was growling.

"P… please stop" Kagome tried to sound as much like an innocent little girl as possible. It worked! Sesshomaru's eyes returned to their normal colouring and the poison ceased to foam around his fangs. The low growl turned into words,

"How dare you speak so woman! You are the one who does not deserve Inuyasha's heart. Inuyasha may be a half demon, but he is still stronger than any demon I have ever fought. His heart is that of a humans, meaning that he is kinder than any demon in the world. My father once told me that half demons were the lowest race. He sent me away to the North, where I was trained to detest humans and half humans. I am sorry to say that my father succeeded in his mission, and after seventy years I hated humans and half-breeds alike. I was sent by my teachers to recover the fang of destruction and kill my brother, but every time I was close to killing him… I…I stopped. I just couldn't manage to kill my little brother. Inuyasha re-opened my eyes and taught me that half-breeds truly are the superior race. Humans and demons are so easily corrupted, but half demons are pure." Sesshomaru dropped Kagome to the ground "It is not worth my time to kill you."

Inuyasha lay on the moist ground, his head spinning. Did his brother really say all these things… was it all true?

" Sesshomaru is …this all true? Do you really mean what you say?" Sesshomaru turned away from the spoiled human, and rushed to his brother's side,

"Hai brother, it's all true. Every word. I'm sorry." Inuyasha reached up and grabbed his brother in a fierce hug " Thank you for coming back."

**The End**

A/N: wow ok that was weird I just sat down and my fingers did the rest. Ok hope you liked it review if you did review if you didn't it just takes a second to make my day (: please give me advice on what to write next or how to fix my current stories I'm having big trouble with _What you mean to me. _OK till we meat again :P . Hey tell me if the ending sucked cause I think it did!

**Ciao Kyokorain ☻ **


	2. Chapter 2

Hi every body I'm really sorry but I fear that the Inuyasha part of my life has ended ( never thought that would happen) and yes I realize that the most horrible thing in the world is waiting for a stoy to continue for so long and then having the stupid lazy author (me) cancel I feel your pain (very very guilty) but never fear because this story is officaily up for adoption do whatever you want! and please I shall hope to have at least one new story up sometime this summer, mybe Harry Potter, Fruits Basket, Naruto or Ouran High school host club. So have a great summer please don't hate me and drop me a line if you want to adopt (I'm shure you will make great parents)


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